Just as a cooling breeze touches all in its path, mercy flows out and touches people, like the ripples caused by a pebble dropped in a body of water. Action creates effect. The actions of others created many mercies in my life.
No doubt the prayers of my grandparents and others kindly assisted me and my family as I was growing up. A woman named Jesse secured food for us children, who lived in the projects. After school and Saturday mornings we would enjoy a treat or cereal and milk. The food always seemed to run out, and if anyone was late it all was gone. But Jesse kept peace among the children when we gathered for food, and we all knew she was our advocate and protector. Jesse’s involvement in our lives was a mercy and beacon of light in the projects we called home. She loved us and we knew it.
I witnessed the mercy of my sister who rescued animals who were abused and tormented for sport. My sister Irma would risk her own safety defending the wounded creatures, then bring them up to our apartment on the 13th floor. She and my mother would feed and provide emergency care, then take the animal to the animal shelter. Witnessing mercy as a child made me see the behavior as something to emulate.
Bread was often our meal, and waiting for it to be prepared and baked seemed an exercise in patience. When the bread was finally baked, we had to wait again. My mother was always generous and despite 12 hungry mouths to feed, we had to wait until she carefully wrapped one of the fresh loaves in a linen cloth for my older brother to deliver to an elderly women who lived alone. I didn’t understand her urgency to give away the highly-coveted bread until I grew up and connected it to offering the first fruits to God in thanksgiving. My mother has always had a heart for those who suffer, and I’m sure that the bread was in some way a token of mercy. When I became a mother, I followed her example and taught my children to care for those in need.
No matter where we are or at what stage of relationship we have with another, there is always an opportunity to show love and mercy. The toughest time for me to do this was when my world was turned upside down. I had received a call from my daughter’s college in Pittsburgh asking me where she was. I prayed that my fears would not come true. My fears did not come true, but my life did turn upside down. My daughter dropped out of school and moved to Florida, where she lived a troubled lifestyle defined by the culture of death. I was anguished and heartbroken and cried for weeks. This particular daughter was the heart of my heart. How could this happen? I turned away from her, not speaking of her and not allowing my other children to speak with her. I treated her as if she were dead. One summer day I went outside to work in my garden as I cried in a thunderstorm. No one could hear my sobs and the rain covered my tears, but the anger and pain was relentless.
I complained to God over and over, and I hated the person who had lured my daughter into such a lifestyle. I wanted to take my child back from the beast who stole her from me and my plan for her. I wanted justice. I begged God to show me what to do and how to do it. Over and over, I pleaded with Him. My mother always taught me to pray for my enemies so I prayed. God certainly did not want me to hate, so I opened my heart and said, “OK, show me how to love her. Show me how to forgive.”
In the “Imitation of Christ,” it says, “love Me in her.” Really? Just love her in You? Yes, well, I can love You all day long, Jesus – that is easy. But all I have to do is to love You in her? Wow. That’s it. I began speaking to my daughter again, and I planned a trip to visit her. With a sense of hospitality and friendship, I greeted the woman I had vehemently hated. She and I talked and exchanged niceties, but I was also candid about my beliefs and how our faith, traditions and moral compass guide what we do and who we become. My daughter worked the night shift and the next day, my daughter said, “What do you think about her?” I paused and said, “To know her is to love her.”
When my heart opened, God’s love and mercy worked through me. Not only did I have hope, my behavior changed and my soul became peaceful. None of this was my doing. God gave me the grace to seek Him and His way. During my visits with my daughter, we spoke of God and His love and mercy and we discussed the Ten Commandments and what it means to reject sin and follow Christ. We discussed the importance of seeking the Truth who is Christ. I acted as a loving mother and lived out my faith in their presence. I prayed for them, and I let go of my desire for revenge.
Loving Christ in others is not only a mercy to that person, but also to the one doing the loving. I experienced a paradigm shift, which made me a more loving child of God. What beauty is there to behold in those we easily cast off as undesirable. I made my amends and learned a powerful lesson, because God in His infinite mercy gave me a most beautiful and powerful lesson – a lesson of love and mercy without measure or limit.
My relationship with Christ taught me that all mercy comes from the cross and the torrent of His mercy flows freely when we embrace this gift of love and extend it to others. Within this gift are the transformative effects of love. “We love, because He first loved us” (1 Jn 4:19). As stated by St. John Paul II, “From the vantagepoint of God’s love, we are moved to genuine repentance – to reform our lives, to detach ourselves from the spirit of the world, turn away from sin, and turn more fully to God. This is exactly how the grace of baptism unfolds in our lives.” (Totus Tuus)
Oh, wonder of wonders that God was calling me to turn away from sin. With what mercy and grace God gently asks us to take His hand, inviting us grow and live with joy and peace. In our brokenness, God’s mercy gives us new life, renewing our minds and spirits, bodies and hearts.
Looking back on my life and its phases and seasons, there are times that are clear examples of mercy where God’s hand touched my heart and got my attention. Other times, I was in misery and could not recognize mercy until the misery had passed. Now I am confident that God’s mercy is all around us and actuated in His people through spiritual and corporal works of mercy. Mercy and love bring the broken, lost and lonely together for a moment, and through that exchange relief comes and hope is ushered in. For a moment, the love of God is experienced, whether the soul is aware or not.
So we give for a price. Isn’t it reasonable we give and receive for a price? Some duty paid, some profit received? Love does not measure, nor does it demand. Love gives and receives and gives again and again. Jesus paid the price on the cross. The ransom of love has been paid and we, His children, blow the seeds of love on the wind of mercy, mercy that has no boundaries or borders, no bias or limit. On the wind of mercy we are touched by the love of Christ.
Dolores King is a member of St. Matthew Church in Charlotte, a lay Dominican, and member of the Apostles of Divine Mercy. This commentary is adapted from a recent talk on mercy that she gave at St. Matthew Church.